Sunday, February 19, 2006

newbirth
standing alone
at the end of winter's road -
promise of new birth

posted by J. Andrew Lockhart at 9:20 AM

4 Comments:

Blogger Little Onion said...

hi j andrew - your poem:

i standing alone

at the end of winter's road

promise of new birth

I see that it's part of a haiga and with the picture it works but maybe not when viewd as a stand alone haiku.

The first two lines work well for me - it puts us in a specific seasonal frame of mind and time.

The last line I think tells us too much - we don't find that promise of new birth new life that spring brings but are told about it.

Is there an image/phrase that you could put here that might show us that promise? We have that with the picture - maybe that makes the last line redundant too even in that context.

I'm looking forward to more of your pictures and posts and hope that you don't mind my meandering thoughts shared here with love and thanks for the poems the pictures!

Little Onion

12:35 PM  
Blogger laryalee said...

A hopeful haiga, Andrew!
I like the connection between the haiku and the image.
Is this your first "text-on" photo?
(for want of a better word, lol!)
Looks great!
:-)
Lary

12:38 PM  
Blogger eric l houck jr said...

wow. words in the photograph! very nice.

12:44 PM  
Blogger J. Andrew Lockhart said...

aurora - thanks for the info I needed!

little onion - I wouldn't use the poem as a haiku alone, granted, but I wanted the photo/poem to "lean" on each other, but still holding a bit of ambiguity -- oh well -- thank you for your ideas, though.

laryalee - Thanks to Aurora this is my 1st one! It took me so long to figure it out, though - it may be a while until I can do it again. :)

eric - thanks!

8:03 PM  

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